BLOOM AND GROW

The light bulb moment for me this year was realizing that I needed to work on my self-esteem. This realization actually came from wanting to blog about everything I did wrong this year.  And at that moment,  I was like, "wait a minute. Why am I always self-reflecting on the negative?" So, as a step in the right direction, I'm flipping that mindset over and writing about all the things I did right year-round.  1. I confronted one of my biggest fears:  I took an exam I was afraid to take. 16 years ago, I took a similar exam and I failed- and that failure marked me because I felt that I had given my best efforts. This time around I went above and beyond and I'm happy I passed. 2. I stuck to being a consistent blogger.   This year, I've written 51 articles on this blog. This one makes 52 by the way. This is more than twice everything I had written on this blog before 2020. Can you imagine!  3. I lost weight. This is almost happening by chance but I noticed that by ea

  It's no doubt that a lot of us are products of our environments. Our backgrounds shape the way we think and the things we believe in. What I know for sure is that we keep passing beliefs from one generation to the next without examining those beliefs to know whether they should be passed on or quenched.   I'm at that point in my life where I need to examine my beliefs and amend some, so that they work for me, going forward. I'll just share a few and I encourage you to do this exercise as well.  1. Not Having the Things My Parents Didn't Have.  A lot of us say that we want to have better lives than what our parents had, but subconsciously we resist change. We didn't have air conditioning units in our apartment growing up. We considered it to be an ostentatious buy.  "Only rich people use AC in their house" was something often said around the house. Now looking back, I see that we were actually well off enough to afford it. 2. My Parents Never Went Abroad.

A while ago, I was part of a mentoring session with Ms. Folake Odediran, the General Manager for the pharmaceutical company, Sanofi Nigeria, Ghana. And as she took her seat to start her session, She looked around the table and said, "I want you all to remember this: you learn to cut trees by cutting trees. " She went on to explain that performing a task over and over again, makes us better at doing that task in the Long run.  However cliche, the truth is that Practice makes perfect.  For example,  I try to read some of my old articles sometimes and I sincerely can't believe how awful they are. For real. Over time and through practice,  I've been able to find my own writing voice and I know for sure that I am better at writing now than I was, a few years ago.  I also remember clearly when my sister first started out as a fashion designer. For a while, the only thing she could make by herself was an A-line skirt and a bustier top. But now, her fashion brand can pretty m

A few years ago, I did a styling gig for a major boutique brand in Lagos and it flopped! The next day I couldn't get out of bed because I could not believe how bad I messed up.   After that incident, I took a break from fashion styling for about six months. I would have quit for good if not for my fashion designer sister who asked me to style her summer collection a few months later. The summer collection went on to be a hit and I've continued styling since then.  We have all experienced setbacks before. At work, at home, and in our various relationships. I've had my fair share as well.  However, being unable to accept the fact that something unbecoming happened to us, is the worst thing we can do to ourselves.  No one is promised a life free of adversity or challenges. So being in denial of our shortcomings would prevent us from growing. Looking back, I realize that I couldn't deal with the embarrassment of failing even after I had taken responsibility for my work.  Ho

Learning to be independent is a continuous process for me. And I am broadly referring to independence as it relates to the various parts of our lives. You can be very independent at work and this might not necessarily be the case on the home front. It's important to know that if there is no one around you, you can take care of yourself.  Emotional independence is important because when it comes to dating, you have to be a whole person without someone else being around you. You must be able to enjoy your own company. That way you can ask yourself important questions like why is this person in my life?  So, what I am highlighting here is the fact that our relationships have to go beyond the mindset of "so that they wouldn't say I don't have anybody" Financial independence is being able to meet your needs. It really does not matter how much you earn. What matters is that you are not at the mercy of money.  Relying on other people excessively can be detrimental to our

"There is a way to be good again" is one of my favorite quotes to date and it's from the book The Kite Runner which I highly recommend that you read. The quote essentially means that we can always get back on track no matter how far we have gone off the tracks.  In the kite runner, Amir witnesses his housekeeper's son Hassan get raped over a kite. Soon, he starts to develop guilt for not intervening in the incident and resorts to framing Hassan's father for theft in order to get him fired from his job as their housekeeper- his plans work.  Soon after, Amir's family flees to the United States due to the Insurgency in their country. Many years later, he finds out that Hassan was actually his half brother! By this time, Hassan has been killed by the same boy (now a terrorist leader) who raped him as a child, and the same terrorist leader is now serially molesting Hassan's surviving heir.  As an act of redemption,  Amir decides to go back to Pakistan to rescue

Prototyping is about executing your ideas by producing samples for testing. You then apply whatever results you get from testing to produce an updated prototype or version which would go through a new cycle of testing and adjustments. You might need to go through several cycles before you achieve a product good enough for marketing. I know prototyping is synonymous with the tech industry but it's actually a business-wide principle.  We all have big dreams. But to achieve your dreams, you must take action; and prototyping is like taking baby steps. Even if you fail, you will learn your lessons and try again. For example, I have had so many blogs that are no longer in existence today. But the truth is that each new blog is an improvement on the last unsuccessful one. In the last few years of prototyping as a blogger, I have improved my writing style and learned about niche blogging.    Whatever your dreams are, start working on them. Your first result does not need to be perfect and